I will admit I have been a bit of a Debbie Downer latley. So much so that I have my inbox full of people asking me if I got a lump of coal for Christmas. I try to be as positive as I can. I try to put myself in check before I hit Debbie Downer Syndrome. I haven't been good at catching myself lately. So there I am, Debbie Downering it up. Sheesh! What I DO appreciate (not the inbox messages from the guys who want to pounce a vulnerable and sad Debbie) is friends like Shannon, who write and have more in depth things to say than "Hey, maybe we can have coffee and talk" (in my Debbie Downer voice) Thanks but no thanks. I'm still trying to keep some hope alive in my perception of Men, and I believe having coffee with you would result in me turning into a full on butch lesbian with a short buzz cut and fanny pack. Waa Waa Waaaaa!
Shannon M Good.
Back to Shannon...he has always had the nicest things to say and always reminds me that things are not as bad as they seem. He has a way of wording things in a manner that if you were sitting next to him, you could see the sincerity in his eyes. He's just a real genuine guy, with very insightful things to say. We exchanged stories tonight on the phone, and while I have been over here channeling my Debbie, he is in his own world dealing with this own batch of disappointments handed by a Female.
He said "I talked with my Mom and she said that when it happens you just know. Yeah, things may not always be easy but by no means are things hard. Cause when you're with that someone, that you KNOW has your back 100% and vise versa, then things actually workout with ease." What he said rang so true. Doesn't it? But what if you're guilty. Guilty of making it harder than it needs to be? Creating unnecessary chaos for unnecessary reasons. Self-Sabotage, I googled it. Reality is a hard pill to swallow...unless you use a bottle of Vodka to chase it down with (hence the self-sabotage). I self diagnoses myself after doing some research of my own. Time to break the pattern. Take responsibility and (wo)man up. Waa Waa Waaaaa!
But, I will admit that hearing that men feel this too, and feel the effects of heartache made me feel a little better. I think we women have this prescription that men go about their day like nothing happened and we women on other hand, cry at every sad song, end up having a pathetic moment where we are smelling the guys shirt that we took home from the first sleepover at his house (and look around to make sure no one witnessed this pathetic moment). Even tough I do know that men will never feel things the way we women do. Women want to fix things right away and men can ignore it and let time go by before they deal with it. So in return, you now have a woman that feels rejected and ignored, and a man that feels smothered and pushed. Why can't we all just get along? To think all of this can be avoided with communication. And NO texting NO longer counts.
Women are NOT from Venus and Men are NOT from Mars. We are BOTH from earth. So let's deal with it. Ok?
I thank Shannon for the good talk and for giving me the males perspective. I have heard what he said tonight from a similar voice in my bed recently. Why it's easier to hear from a male friend vs the guy that's in your thoughts? I will never know. Waa Waa Waaaaa!
*Garbage- Stupid Girl