Monday, January 31, 2011

Old Hussy On Board


I try and have patients when the elderly are on the road. Sometimes I use my horn and even yell mean things in my car, like "MOVE, you retard", Or, "Seriously? What are you 80? Ya dumb f***k." Then I pass them, and realize it's this little old lady, who I just so rudely bullied and insulted with my car and my youth. I have a moment when I feel like a real shithead, and even though they can't hear me (and a good chance they couldn't even if I said it 2 feet away) I say "Oooops! Sorry, Granns/Gramps."

I try to remember that it won't be long until I'm driving at 80, with my fuchsia hair and my ash hanging 2 inches off my cigarette, flipping off the shitheads that bully me with their fast cars and reckless youth. I'll be passing all of them with my middle finger in the air, yelling.....

"KISS MY WRINKLY ASS, YA SHITHEAD!!"


Then, I'll get out and stretch...
right in front of the High School Football team.

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