Thursday, October 14, 2010

Frankly, My Dear, I Don't Give A Damn

I deal with the emotions that every humans was instilled with. It's part of the human willingness to function. As humans we also have a desire and need to be loved. I will never understand that one. I do but I struggle with it (I contradict myself by being cynical). Robyn (my hair gal) and I were talking. Those movies we have all watched as young girls, has ruined it for us. Even if I think it IS out there, minus camera crew and ending credits. We set Men to a standard that I don't think any of them will ever be able to live up to. I won't settle for anything less then someone who truly adores me, and dips me before a kiss, like good old Clark Gable.

I believe we have made it to easy for Men as well. We have begged and pouted and burned our bra's in order to prove that we are equals and we deserve to be just as powerful as Men. Yet, we get mad when they don't open our doors and get weird when they pay for our dinners. Even after we wear the independent sign on our foreheads. Later realizing that not wearing a bra not only hurts your back, but it's really needed for us to feel like Woman.

Casual sex, as casual as you both have clearly made it, I still go home with a bit of a crushed heart. The harsh reality that you click an connected with someone means nothing when it's said and done. It makes me horribly sad. Are those not the things that people look for, crave and desire? Isn't it? But yet those things have also become casual. Everything is so casual these days. No accountability for feelings or actions that lead you to what you were feeling, that lead you to those actions, that later lead you to blog shit like this. You with me? I guess I'm casually blogging these days, too.

I have gotten really good at getting over the things that hurt me pretty quickly. But the day I spend really FEELING these things, I feel them and I feel them hard. I cry. I think. It literally handicaps me. But I always know that this too shall pass. Life is made up of things like this. For every day I smile and have laughter and peace, there will always be disappointment and pain to make those euphoric days appreciated. I'm strong but I have a soft heart. I don't want these experiences to ever take that away from me. I walk a little more cautious, but my heart will always be open. It's the world I choose to live in. I welcome my mistakes. They are good for me. I'm just glad to be in a good place at the moment!

Because, frankly, my Dear, they don't give a damn!

"Don't waste your time trying to educate somebody about your righteousness" -Brad Wheeler


  1. Thanks for posting this - so much I can relate to. As much as break up's suck, it's always nice to give it a good hard cry and then suddenly, you feel relieved. I'm currently going through this process and have the thrill of still living with the bastard until I find my own place (I know you are probably rolling your eyes right now ;) ). With all this being said, I gave it a good hard cry a few days ago, and suddenly everything seems better. I know I dont want or need this person in my life, I'm not angry at him, I hope he does well, and I know he's allowing more doors to open for me. And when my pretty little ass steps out that door, it'll be a f*ck you enough, to heal my heart! So thank you for putting it all in perspective! Keep posting!

  2. Hi There! Thank you so much for the comment. I'm sorry to hear you are dealing with some heartache and disappointment. I know how hard that can be. I have NO doubt that more doors will and ARE already opening for you. Bad relationships are toxic and we forget that we don't need them and that they are really hard on our souls.

    I'm currently not dealing with any heartache or anything of this nature. I was thinking a lot about this when I wrote this. I deal with confusion and, I am, my worst enemy at times in my own head.

    Thank you for sharing. Best of luck :)